NTMP 115: Vestigial Dumplings

Not me getting fitted for a murder cloak.

New-To-Me Phrases, June 30, 2024

Incel Camino * Daemon’s murder cloak * Cleaner Walmart * Pregnant pasta * English muffing * Gish gallop * Vestigial craving * Testicle swans

Photo by Raphael Schaller on Unsplash

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The Phrases, With Context

This week, we have jokes about a car that looks like a 5-year-old’s “draw the car of the future” art project, foods inside other foods, and Freudian corporate malice.

But first: A poll.

Been a while since I’ve done a monthly poll. I like to keep things chaotic, like my skull’s interior. Here you go:

And now for some phrases. Let’s get to it!

1. Incel Camino

I was talking with my kids about how it feels like all of the jokes about Elon Musk’s Cybertruck have already been made. The internet is fresh out of jokes.

Have you read any good ones?

My contribution is that it looks like a Chrysler K-car and a dumpster had a baby.

But then I saw Incel Camino, a riff on perennial joke vehicle, the El Camino and, well, what more is there to say?

Sidebar: I cannot think of the Chrysler K Car without remembering an anecdote Dave Thomas wrote about in his book recalling his time on SCTV where he and my comedy fave Rick Moranis once drag raced rented Chrysler K Cars down the main streets of Edmonton, Alberta at four in the morning.

2. Daemon’s murder cloak

This is a very inside-baseball joke about a character in House of the Dragon, made by Greta Johnson, co-host of the HBO podcast about the show.

In the show, somehow-hot-now Matt Smith does more than one murder, as a little treat, after donning his cloak to disguise his pale hair that gives him away as member of the royal Targaryen family. The reference only makes sense as the pattern forms, and I cackled when I heard it.

3. Cleaner Walmart

My middle kid (who does not read this newsletter) described Target thusly.

This is hilarious but not quite accurate, because Target’s bathrooms are always disgusting in an over-the-top way that almost feels like intentional malice.

Nevertheless, a great joke.

4. Pregnant pasta

Last week I spent three days in Chicago with two friends I’ve known forever but who had not yet met in person. It was glorious: we walked, ate, and talked about our work and creative side projects. A dreamy micro salon.

While eating fried and steamed dumplings at the kitchen counter (WHY do Airbnbs eschew dining tables???) from Korean taco joint Del Seoul, we listed other stuffed foods we love—pierogi, ravioli, etc. and one friend described them as pregnant pasta. I know what I’m having for lunch!

5. English muffing

This was a hilarious menu typo spotted at our breakfast place in Chicago.

I’ll have what she’s having.

(Here’s where I write a callback joke about Hot Matt Smith.)

6. Gish gallop

The less time I spend here writing about Trump, Biden, that shitshow of a debate, or the upcoming election, the better. But this week we’re gonna go there, even if briefly, because Gish gallop is a fascinating phrase and technique that Trump uses.

I wasn’t a debate nerd so I’m thankful that

Heather Cox Richardson

wrote about this last week in her coverage of the debate:

This was not a debate. It was Trump using a technique that actually has a formal name, the Gish gallop, although I suspect he comes by it naturally. It’s a rhetorical technique in which someone throws out a fast string of lies, non-sequiturs, and specious arguments, so many that it is impossible to fact-check or rebut them in the amount of time it took to say them. Trying to figure out how to respond makes the opponent look confused, because they don’t know where to start grappling with the flood that has just hit them.

I hate this post-facts era so much.

7. Vestigial craving

I say a lot of stupid shit but not all of it makes it into this newsletter. This phrase is one I coined to describe the feeling of walking through the Chicago neighborhood I lived in during the ‘90s (Roscoe Village) and craving an alcoholic beverage. Thanks to menopause, I don’t drink much anymore, and the sensation surprised me. It felt like a vestigial craving from another lifetime.

8. Testicle swans

If you ever doubted the link between dinosaurs and birds, take a look at a baby bird. Via NTMP superfan Rebecca, who always sends me the best stuff. This was on Instagram and I couldn’t find the original source.

That’s it for this week! Remember to keep making it weird, and stay furiously curious.